Childline bereavement advice for the pandemic

Losing a loved one is a heart-breaking experience and sadly one that more of us than usual have had to face this year due to the global pandemic.

New analysis by bereavement charity Sudden has shown that in Crawley, there were 74 Covid-19 deaths within 28 days of a positive test, leaving an estimated 370 local people affected by sudden bereavement and increased risk of experiencing PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).

For children, feelings of grief and loss can be much harder to process. It’s common for children to wonder if what they’re feeling is right or wrong and they might not understand some of the complex emotions they’re experiencing.

Children who speak to the NSPCC’s Childline service tell us they feel confused, scared, numb or out of control. They wonder if they’re ever going to feel ok again.

One 17-year-old girl told our counsellors: “I am struggling to come to terms with the death of my gran last week. She passed away due to coronavirus unexpectedly. I feel angry and upset because I didn’t get to say goodbye. I am finding it difficult at night as I keep thinking about her and my emotions overwhelm me. I don’t feel I can talk to mum about it because it was her mum that died and she is in a difficult place.”

If you’re a parent or carer and you’re worried your child might be struggling with feelings of grief there are a few things you can do to help them:

Encourage them to talk

Ensure they know they can talk to you and talking won’t upset you even more. Sometimes if a child knows you’re grieving too they can be reluctant to open up but talking about how they’re feeling can really help.

If they don’t feel comfortable talking to you remember they can call Childline on 0800 1111.

When they can’t find the words

You can’t predict how your child might feel – they might want to keep their feelings to themselves, or they might find the emotions so overwhelming they simply have to let them out. There are lots of ways they can try and express themselves:

Encourage them to express their feelings with Childline’s online Art Box tool or doing something creative.

Try releasing anger by screaming into a pillow.